After working so long, I have finally finished some parts of the site. Firstly, the login and the settings for all the user. Only the admin permission though, looks like I am uber slow at this. I have also finish the tasks and group creation part of the group, but still think of how to store the data for single user. Looks like a hard day in front of me.
Today, is a special day. Today is the day of the presidential election. Actually, I do not care a lot about the presidential election, but it helps us have another holiday. So that is why we move most of my things back home. We then went to pepperoni, some kind of pizza shop for lunch. Wow. The pizza is nice. The cheese is very runny and smoky, making the cheese on the pizza very nice. The food there was quite nice, but we spent quite a lot there today, like 70 bucks for a lunch for 4 people. The food was nice though, it was all worth it. Today, I officially upgraded my phone. Yeah, the white cool looking one. I downloaded some games. Yeah, fun. Just realized I am left with lots of work to finish. What the hell, I do not think I have enough time to do all those. The higher paper for mathematics is so difficult, cannot even solve the first part, looks like I have to put in some hard work. After my failure in biology and chemistry, I must work harder so as to be able to get better marks, must get less than 2.5! Good luck to me!
This term was filled with dissapointment, i do not know why but it seems that i have failed alot of subjects this term due to the fact that I have been living in the boarding school. Subjects I have done badly in includes chemistry, which I failed. English, I have hoped for a B3, vague essay it seems. And of course, Biology, which I hoped to get an A1 in, missed all the keywords, of all reasons.
When all hopes seemed to be lost. My physics marks turned out to be the 3rd in class. What a delight. But my MSG will be too screwed, 2.89, (if my chinese got an A2). I don’t know what is wrong with me. It is just like, i felt i did quite well, but screw it, i got to be a failing grade, especially chemistry. Hope to increase my grades next term. All the way…
Today is a okay day. Just that the Chinese paper was damn hard and that I had screwed up my maths. I am not missing them as much now, I just hope to remember them when I am deciding whether to go for the trip to Beijing or to Xi’an. The Chinese was not too good either, I wrote a lot of points and ran out of words, so it might be quite screwed (depends on the mood of the teacher).
After school, we went to the tv studio to record some science challenge thingy. We almost won, but committed suicide for the last question and thus, NanYang came in first, then , we second. Now, I am feeling damn down, first it is Chem test yesterday, then it is Chinese test today, then there is the Maths test, lots of test to cover, still got time for games?
To tell the truth, I am very tired and is going to fall asleep anytime. I am just too tired. I guess this is the way I am born to work. Good nite, I got to sleep to keep healthy. Gd nite !
Today is the day where the Xi’an guest will be going back to China. I dunnoe why, but I am feeling so down. I miss them a lot. Although I did not interact with them much these few days, I felt as though I was leaving some close friends. Then, there was Yi Yang, which was nicknamed the “lollipop”. He is very sweet and even took video of him saying goodbye. It was really when we went out when I really get to know them well. I went out with them on two trips, one to Sentosa, one to Orchard.
What I remembered most about the Sentosa trip was the shopping at VivoCity. We were walking and shopping at VivoCity and I was accompanying the girls. Before that, they were quite unhappy with us as they think that we do not care for them, but after much reminders, we showed our care for them more evidently. Although I left the place tired and lethargic, I felt happy to actually be able to interact with other people, people that I am not familiar with.
The person that I remembered the most would be yi-jie, when we went to VivoCity to shop, she was the person who got lost after the whole trip, but it was through that accident that Jeremy got to really show his feelings for her. She was quite active and was gets jealous easily, she always wants company and is often blunt with her words. She cried when we were about to left and it took quite a long while for her to stop crying, watching her cry was heart-breaking, I feel bad about leaving them too. She was sweet and gave me a hug before going.
Another person that had left a deep impression of me was Cindy. She is quite studious and is one of our buddy. She speaks perfect English and and our jokes came too far, she would be the one who would bluntly tell us and comment that our EQ is low, although we found it quite insulting, we did not really take it to heart and just treated it like comments from friends. (Actually, not a lot of us, only me and Jarel, the poor souls). She was quite sweet and wrote a sweet letter for me and gave me a plush toy.
Then another will be the other girl from our class. She is a Harry Potter fan and went to the bookstore to buy the whole set of harry potter books, but what was sad for her was that we had left at such a late time that she did not get to eat anything and then we were having a hungry time on the bus, with Cindy teaching us how to treat girls and the physiology behind the thinking of females. She was sweet and like playing badminton.
It was a sad affair for all of us. I miss all of them dearly and hope to see them again. When I think about leaving them, my heart feels numb, I do not know why, but it is the friendship that we had built up over the few days. I thank them dearly had certainly appreciate them. I was not feeling anything until this morning, looks like my EQ is still quite low. I believe that we had our good times and good time are always meant to end. Deep down, I feel so numb and down, I feel tired when I think about their leave. It is the first time I have this feeling, the ache, oh my god, I think I am missing them very much.
Wish them all the best in Xi’an! Hope to see them next year. (wish me best in my msg, so that I can go there next year)
I have worked so hard each day, trying to get good results after another, trying to make sure that my grades do not fall below my expectation. But this bring me so much trouble, so much that I am not able to be able to live a second of my life not thinking about school. After all the schooling that I have previously received and it is more education that I will be going to receiving for the next few years. But is this the hectic life that I have longed for after so many years of hard work in school.
How I miss my childhood times, where I can play all day and just concentrate on playing, without giving a care about other things in the future, can’t I just live the world as it is. Is it a natural reflex for me to plan what I am going to do next, does that means that I am going to spend the rest of my sad life, sitting down, staring at the tv, computer screen or pages and pages of books? Why plan and worry about the future when you can be enjoying life a the moment.
It is easy to say ‘Live in the moment’, but how many can do that? Is it possible to even stop pondering about the future at all?
People don’t always understand me. I am always the evil guy who to screw people matter’s up, but that is not the case at all. I have always tried to help, but when help is given, there is no gratefulness, instead, all that came my way was endless insults and random accusation. But what have I done wrong?
Am I wrong to give help when help is needed, or am I wrong to even agree to help. In normal circumstances, people will tend to ignore me and act as if I am not there at all, but when the need arise, many will crowd around me, asking me questions that they think I know. Am I only there just to help, am I not a human, do I not have any feelings too.
Although there are many people who do that to me, I believe that I still have some friends that I consider ‘true friends’. Some of them really tries to help me when I am in need. And when I request of something that he is capable of, he will try and do it. Though I have many friends, those true ones are only a few, a number that could be counted by fingers on one hand alone.
I do not know why, but I think that John Lennon’s song, ‘Imagine’, really suit my situation, what are the differences between me and the rest of the world that make me so unappreciated and the society so unfriendly towards me. What is wrong with me?
People call me a retard, one who do not think before acting, but that is not the case, I am not the dreamer that they say I am, in fact, I find myself thinking very logically and acting very normally, I just do not understand, what is it that people have to go against me. Why is the world not helping me?